| Sometimes there are things which I may not say, for saying such words are usually the trigger for a dynamic change, changes that brings out to surface what was meant to be hidden into the depts of the abyss. And yet those hidden words and thoughts are clawing, everyday, everynight, it does not rest, for its sole purpose is meant to torment the soul and mind. Im finding it increasingly difficult to take hold of it, straggle it and to throw it back whence it came. Im finding hard to believe, but it seems that I have no reason to convince my actions anymore, rather my thoughts are drifted towards finding comfort with this thing thats torments me.Im finding it increasingly difficult to not just let it be and let chaos consume me. All this time I have been fighting alone, winning every battle yet, with every win I diminish my chance of success in the next. And my tormentor only needs one....only needs one win in one battle to overtake me. And I'm losing, I can feel it. No allies, no faith to call upon....I have called upon them to much...they no longer heed my call. I can sense desperation within me, a last gasp of breath to seek aid and vanquish the tormented soul. But something like this cannot be taken away, it just sits idle, for time is its essence, and it has all the time in the world to consume me. I just have but to falter just once. So I ask, why do I fight, everytime I do I ask, for the utter faith and for hope. How long can it sustain me? Some say forever as the abyss stays Idle, so why am I Faltering? and it replies, because your losing faith, your losing hope. And I say. --'oh. ---- Corfe --" Grin, not like I havn't gone through this before, there's been worst, lot more worst. Just this time. Little afraid cause the ante's tenfold more." Sometimes I feel lucky to have friends who can provide sound and honest advice. 'Live a little...and let live a little, let them discover themselve, then judge.' Aye I say Aye... = ) |
